Dating after 45 for women

So bear with us and understand we need to be cautious. Its easy access , for already attatched people , some are always looking for extra , i suppose already attatched are never happy , or they would not be on there.

Do not see the point being somewhere where you need to look elsewhere as well. How about accepting the norm instead of looking for what becomes the norm anyway. Ooh thats scary. Scary, as in murder and physically hurting me. I couldn't care less if someone I knew saw my profile. I guess that's one of the advantages of self confidence that comes with age — no fear of making a fool of yourself! I agree with Evan that you need to get over your fear of online dating! I was divorced after being married for 22yrs and online dating helped me ease back in to dating.

I got to know a lot of different men and it was fun emailing and chatting. I think in any type of situation you have to be careful because you can meet someone who will be deceptive in some way. I find online dating to be safe because you can ask those uncomfortable questions about who a person is, in the safety of your own space. I won't meet any man who won't give me his last name and where he works, phone number, etc. Most good men understand a single woman has to be extra careful. Those that don't, they don't get a date with me!

Always meet in a public place a few times before you feel comfortable. If you still don't want to take the plunge, pick up some classes with a hobby you have wanted to get into. Be open and carry yourself in a way that makes you approachable. But really think more about getting Evan's help. Good luck! No offense Cindy, but reading your post reminded me of some women I dated, and they were absolutely horrible relationships.

Online and Offline

Also, your little detective work would screw you out of some great guys if you are too harsh. I can totally understand if the guy pops up with a history of violence or drug arrests, but my friend is a member of a not so exclusive club. See, many men here in Florida get a restraining order put on them. It pretty much goes like this…women here often use them as power plays. Men with no history of violence end up with them.

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Without a lawyer, a judge will almost always grant it. For a long time, the state used to hold both parties accountable to the order.

Not anymore. What happens a lot is the woman asks for a restraining order.

A woman who issues them said it is the most abused section of the law. OK, so a six month, or 1 year order may be in place. But after a couple of months, the woman makes contact, if it takes that long. The couple then start meeting on the sly. Dumb move for the guy, but many do it, trying to patch up a marriage or relationship. Anyway, at some point, the woman gets mad again, and when she does, she calls the cops on him. Guys have been arrested with the woman in his car. Why arrest the guy when she got into his car? Or his apartment? Yet it happens. One of the women I had a short relationship with was like that.

She was always checking up on me. And the thing is, if she had any kind of suspicion, she would never just come out and ask.

She would try to beat around the bush. For instance, one of her friends claimed that I hit on her. The truth? I did not. This other girl is a known trouble maker. She likes drama. Needs drama. She probably knew how my girlfriend was so suspicious and thus wanted to throw her in a tizzy. Well instead of just coming to me and asking me, she asked all of these weird questions trying to trip me up. It took weeks before I found out what she was up to. The thing is, I had verifiable proof as to where I was when I was supposedly hitting on her friend.

But this was a pattern with her. And the worst part was, the only thing she would ever really believe was a negative finding. In other words, I am sure she always wondered if I really had hit on her friend.

Had I told her I had, she owuld have believed that, even with the evidence that I could not have. So she was always digging, always playing detective. Good lord was it ever a nightmare. I was laughing while reading this plea for all the innocent men that wind up with restraining orders through absolutely no fault of their own.

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Sad that you think women are so gullible. You sound exactly like the type of person that should be avoided completely. The process is not the same in every state, and there is a lot of proof to what he said. It is true that both parties are not held to the order, which is crazy.

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Have you never known people that went through this? I have seen that where women I know have taken out restraining orders and then later, start contacting him, and go to meet with him. In fact, more often than not, the guy will insist that if she wants to meet, it has to be at his place, or his car, because he is under the false assumption that this gives him standing if they are caught together, or if she tries to get him arrested for violating the order. Yes there are cases where both men and women legitimately need protective orders against the other person, but there are many who do it as a way to gain the upper hand in a divorce, or some other situation.