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10 Ways Men Blow Their Dating Opportunities

What are the chances that the first person you connect with is a perfect match? If you want to find a high-quality person who has their shit together, you have to become one, too. Guys want to know how to instantly get over approach anxiety. Discover the one secret to having amazing conversations or becoming a natural flirt. Find that illusive cure to all their problems. What steps in my life do I need to take to be a more attractive person long-term? The only time they consider putting in any real effort is after shit goes wrong.

But you can only fake it for so long. Healthy relationships take constant work from both parties. You need to maintain the connection between you — especially sexually. They laugh, touch, and flirt like a new couple. Their passion is almost tangible. If you want an amazing, fulfilling relationship, you need to be in it for the long haul.

And you should start now. I learned this the hard way. Oh how wrong I was. Everyone has a breaking point and will eventually break free from being controlled. That can happen through building resentment, shutting you out, ending the relationship, or you guessed it — cheating. What you can control is finding the right person for you and striving to be the best partner possible.

Communicate your feelings openly and directly. State your boundaries but also be reasonable. People tend to cheat when they feel something is lacking in their relationship — either emotionally or romantically. For the people who cheat even then, why would you want to be in a relationship with them? Is she communicating as much as she used to? Has she been investing in a romantic way flirting, getting intimate?

Is she hanging out with you and saying she wants to be a couple again?

How often should I text her? Should you text a girl everyday?

Invite her to hang out. Flirt with her, be physical, and go for a kiss. A common response I get when advising guys to make a move …. This girl you like, is she a virgin? And do you think it was all friendliness and rose petals? There was probably a lot of moaning. She probably tried different positions. She may even use a toy that vibrates or one that she puts inside her.

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My point is to stop associating flirting and showing your romantic intentions as shameful. Desiring a woman does not make you a pervert. Sex is healthy and everyone wants it. Show her you want sex with her for the right reasons. But for now, I simply advise you do this in person because this is very advanced stuff for people who already enjoy great success. The answer is a resounding NO! If you do this, it may seem to her that you have nothing much going on in your life apart from her. It can often seem needy and desperate.


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Actually, not texting a girl for a day or two is a very powerful tactic which builds a lot of anticipation. Because that will only cause you tons of unnecessary worry. Personally, I only text girls to set up dates, and then to set up further dates. Or to make a new platonic friend and not a lover.

This will increase my chances of success significantly more than if we were texting all day. When are you free? Because if she really wanted to meet you, she would FIND the time as that would be in her best interest. Personally, I love when a man takes the lead, especially during the dating phase.

Whether that's setting up the date and picking a place for dinner, surprising us with flowers or leaning in for that first kiss, show us you're someone with a little initiative. I'm not saying that you have to get all dressed up, in fact, sometimes that shows you're trying a little "too" hard.

Plus, a lot of women like a guy who can both dress well but also can be a bit rugged.


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But if you're going to take a girl out, especially if it's someone you're really into, put a little effort into your appearance. We like that and it can go a long way! Every girl, and guy for that matter, probably has a story about dating someone who only calls or texts them to "hang out" in the middle of the night. If you could potentially see the relationship going somewhere down the road, than this tip is simple. If it's the beginning phase of a relationship and you're out late with your friends, you're better off going home to bed than calling us at 2 a.

Hold off to set up a proper date at a proper time.

I sincerely apologize if it seems like I'm being too harsh on the men out there! That is not the intention, so this last tip is a little more positive than the rest. I understand that men have a tough time in the dating scene, too. And often, men need a dose of self-love just as much as women. So this last statement trumps all the other advice: No matter who you are, what you look like or what you do, just be confident in that.


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Nothing is more sexy than a man who knows who he is and doesn't make any excuses for it. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. She was reasonably flustered, confused, hurt and at the end of her rope when it comes to dating. This post was inspired by the trials and tribulations of my girlfriends, my clients and myself.

For the men out there, I wanted to share these lessons with you. If you say you're going to call, please, just call. Act interested, but not too interested. Chivalry is NOT dead. Offer to pay on the first date.