Christian perspective on sleeping in the same bed?
Discussion in ' Courting Couples ' started by ttaylor , Mar 22, We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless! Mar 22, 1. A few months ago I started what I see as my first serious relationship. This is the first time that I can see my girlfriend turning into my wife. We've talked about the fact that we can both see this moving towards marraige, but we have a long distance relationship.
sharing a bed with your girlfriend/boyfriend
Over our mutual spring break we spent as much time as we could together, including sleeping in the same bed. Most of our best discussions happenned before we would go to sleep. We've discussed the fact that we aren't going to have sex before marraige, and also the fact that we won't hide anything that we do from our parents.
When her parents asked her where I was sleeping, we were honest about it, and the discussion that followed led her well, led us, but I don't much enjoy it to believe that we shouldn't share a bed because of the image that it portrays to other people that won't believe that we're not having sex. As a result of this new opinion, I slept alone for the last few days of the break. I truly believe that the both of us will be able to show the restraint to not have sex until we're married and I've read the scriptures about removing yourself from temptation proverbs 6: I think that temptation is different to different people, and I can see why others should be encouraged not to sleep in the same bed, especially if they haven't discussed premarital sex.
Because while I probably couldn't put fire in my lap without being burned, I am able to sleep with my girlfriend without having sex. I also believe that it's out of our hands whether or not people will think that we're having sex, because people are judgemental. Does anyone have any arguments for or against sleeping in the same bed, or possibly have a personal experience that would support either side of the argument? We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today? Mar 22, 2.
I think you should not sleep in the same bed. While you're not having sex, it's still a level of intimacy that is probably not wise to indulge in outside of marriage. I realize that it's hard to come up with a strict rule and you can start pushing back what about napping on the couch? But I don't think following this rule will lead you astray, nor do I think it's a terrible burden, while breaking it could lead to bad things.
There isn't much reason to break it and plenty of reasons not to. If all your friends are having sex, you're more likely to have sex - and vice versa. I wouldn't want to imply causation, but this is another weak reason not to engage in "scandalous" behavior - it might make a Christian friend discouraged because even you are sleeping with your girlfriend - because he presumes that means sex. But this is a weak reason.
Mar 22, 3. Its a depressing realization that this is probably the best way to conduct ourselves, but I would feel better about depriving us of something that was so good for our relationship if I knew that the reasons were rooted in the Bible instead of society's view on what we might be doing. Mar 22, 4.
The Bible mentions few realities of modern life directly. The whole notion of dating somebody for a while would be foreign to that society - expression of interest with engagement and marriage following soon after. Until this last century, doing what you did would likely result in a shotgun wedding even without sex.
If you're going to talk about "good for your relationship", whatever that actually means, sexual intercourse is "good" for it. I mean, it's what cements the bond of marriage, definitely a plus for the relationship. The primary reason, again, is not what society thinks, but the fact that this is quite intimate and some levels of intimacy really should be reserved for marriage.
Mar 22, 5. My husband and I were in a long distance relationship before we were married. We usually slept in seperate beds, either in seperate rooms or the same room. I think we did share a bed maybe a few times, though -- like one time I remember pushing our beds together because we were sad about me leaving the next morning and just wanted to hold each other all night we were pretty depressed. We were able to wait until after we were married for sex and other sexual activities. I don't necessarily think sharing a bed is a good idea, though -- it can be done but it can look bad to others and it can be more tempting.
Mar 22, 6. I sleep much better with my special lady than I do alone, whether we have sex or not. If that's true for you, then I suppose that's a good enough reason to do it.
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Mar 22, 8. My husband and I were extremely sexually active long before we were married. We moved in together after six months of dating and were engaged after 2 years of dating.
Sleeping together with no sex - Bible Christian
We were already living together for two years so there was no point in moving out just to move back in together. The bed we had was our bed and neither of us wanted to sleep on the couch so we slept Jin bed together. It was hard to abstain this way but fighting the temptation helped us grow stronger. It was worth it completely. The one problem that arose from us living together was out officiant. We both agreed that the most important thing about when where and how we were getting married was that we used a pastor as our officiant, that we be married with God as the center focus of the marriage.
We asked my husbands uncle and three months before the wedding he called us and said it had been bothering him for a while and that he could not marry us. And God and none of my business. I think that couples need to do what works for them. I have heard that religious leaders often disapprove of sleeping in the same bed if sex before marriage is counterindicated because of appearance sake. So if you are abstinant for religious reasons you might want to talk to your religious leader. That would be my Fiance and I! We live together and have for almost a year now, we sleep in the same bed every night and we are not having sex until the wedding.
Hungry for God; Starving for Time
We have taken a lot of crap about living together before marriage and judgment from other Christians. But when I read the part about others judging, I applied it to my sistuation a little differently. I believe that the Creator of sex designed it to be enjoyed best in its proper context; between a man and women who commit their lives to each other.
We commonly call it marriage. And if sleeping in the same bed without sex or sexual activity is achieved, it can still present a probably to others. In high school, I thought I had wanted to wait until marriage.
So when I moved in with my then-boyfriend, we slept in the same bed with no sex. My fiance and I are waiting until we are married to have sex but we do live together and sleep in the same bed. There have been a handful of times when the temptation has been really really strong. I think it really depends on the church and especially the denomination.
They base it on the appearance of sin. The more liberal churches and denominations might not see anything wrong with it. Find support, ask questions, swap stories, and follow brides planning real weddings here on Weddingbee. Christian perspective on sleeping in the same bed?
Kacey23 5 years ago I would assume that if a couple is in a sexual relationship then sleeping in the same bed is pretty normal. How do you as a Christian feel about this? Slybrarian 5 years ago Wedding: May Sleeping next to someone is one of the best feelings on Earth.