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  • First Message Strategy #1: Go For Laughs!
  • 1. Make sure your profile is complete before you message anyone!
  • 11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses;
  • 2. Create an intriguing opening line!

For more advice, check out our top tips for writing your online dating profile. Just aim for something pithy and personalised. If your match mentions loving a specific film, use a quote from it as your subject.

If they love a certain stand-up comic, use the beginning of one of their jokes you know. Research has shown that people warm towards hearing their own name in conversation.

Answer their questions

Make it sweet and fun. Instead, start by saying what caught your eye about their profile. If their profile made you laugh out loud in the middle of Tesco, say it. If you despaired of ever meeting a woman who loved football even if you question her choice of team , say it. A lot of real-world dating advice tells men to be more confident, but apparently hemming and hawing a little works well online.

First Message Online Dating Formula That Works (With Examples)

It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening. It could be that women like guys who write mumbly. Mentioning your religion helps you, but, paradoxically, it helps you most if you have no religion. These are the religious terms that appeared a statistically significant number of times. Atheist actually showed up surprisingly often times per 10, messages, second only to mentions of christian and ahead of for jewish and for muslim. But ideally you should just disbelieve the whole thing. The program then aggregated results by phrase before presenting the data.

No one at OkCupid read any actual user messages to compile this post.

First Message Strategy #2: Connect On Common Ground

And the better she feels about talking to you, the more likely she is to share her number. The example above is more suited for a dating site where longer messages are the norm, but you can get her talking about herself on a dating app with a short message like this:. Those three elements are crucial if you want to get a response to your online dating opener. Weekday evenings are generally best — many women unwind from a long day at work by firing up a dating app while catching up on Netflix.

Step 8: How to respond to your first message

According to Nielsen , activity on both OkCupid and Tinder peaks at 9 pm, and usage starts to rapidly decline after 10 pm. On Bumble, the real action starts a little earlier, with activity peaking at 6 pm. And if you happen to find yourself stuck inside due to inclement weather like a blizzard, hurricane or rainstorm, put these first message examples to good use. NBC News did a little investigating, and found that bad weather goes hand in hand with increased activity on dating sites and apps.

In many cases, the increase was pretty dramatic. Send her a light-hearted follow up message like this one:.

Exactly What To Say In A First Message – The OkCupid Blog

The more messages you send, the more desperate you look. Women are too smart to fall for them. Not only do copy and paste messages work , but we get incredible results for our clients with them.