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We want to answer your questions. We stay because we love. We have 11 children together ranging from age 6 to I'm currently a practicing lawyer who focuses on settlement processes and providing a common sense approach to legal disputes. My husband is a stand up comedian and together we use laughter, faith, compassion and patience to keep our marriage, family, and businesses functional in the face of the challenges that are part of living with DID.
Want the best Mighty stories emailed to you? The Sensitivity Factor - http: The Denial Factor - http: The Age Factor - http: The Comfort Factor - http: In each of these posts, I look at factors other than trauma that helped to contribute to my own development of DID. Trauma is the key ingredient. But it doesn't necessarily follow that if you suffered abuse and don't have DID, you weren't as severely abused. There may be other reasons why you don't have DID when others do. I would not assume it's about the severity of the trauma. Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment, Jadon.
And please don't hesitate to share and ask questions. I do not recall sexual abuse altho my twin sister has "memories".. I recall being in a constant state of fear of mom's rages and the catholic church practices, the Detroit riots in my neighborhood I would be hyper vigilant and my body would create migraines to dissociate. I can somewhat remember the event. Some have labeled it Dissociative Amnesia I'm not concerned with the DX as finding the underlining reasons to my depression.
I am aware of the many "sides" of me.. The intellegent professional who is medicaly trained..
Holly and Dana- Thanks for answering. We have a fear of judgement, of stigma and of being abused again. I do my best to protect the others. Is it possible for each alter to have their own personality disorder?
Love and DID: Sometimes More is Less | HealthyPlace
I'm having a hard time accepting this whole concept,but I guess I have no choice but to believe what i'm told. I also refuse to belive that I alone, have anxiety dissorder, panic attacks, social phobia,OCD, dependant personality and many others so if i do have MPD, that would explain alot. I would appreciate any information you may provide. Comorbidity with Dissociative Identity Disorder is not at all unusual.
And it is possible for certain alters to experience symptoms that other parts do not. For example, an alter may struggle with severe depression while another member of the system is consistently upbeat, positive, and happy. Working with alters on their particular struggles is important.
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But when it comes to diagnoses, it's common and, I believe, preferable to diagnosis the system as a whole. Though those with DID experience themselves as distinctly separate people, ultimately they are one severely fragmented person. But because they apply to at least one, they apply to the system as a whole.
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It's also not uncommon for those with Dissociative Identity Disorder to receive multiple diagnoses before finally being diagnosed with DID. DID is designed to go undetected and therefore diagnosing it can be difficult. Spotting comorbidites, like Major Depression or an anxiety disorder for instance, is often easier. I wanted to thank you for this blog.
I've been romantically involved with someone with DID for the last six years, which has been very hard to both cope with and understand. And though some of his parts have tried their hardest to push me away, seeing what's really going on , with compassion, has always made me want to stick with him, and stay. This is the first discussion I've read that really captures what it's like to have someone with DID as a partner, as well as providing insight on how hard it actually is for them to be in a romantic relationship when they are constantly shifting and switching parts.
That I didn't totally understand, until I bookmarked and have been rereading everyone's comments. My partner has many parts, or alters, but two major ones he shifts between -- I am the "hated villain" to one, and the woman he "really does deeply love - forever! I have been treated like I mean the world to him, and then without warning treated as if I dropped off the world tomorrow he couldn't care less. Other parts have also been attracted to other people, and it's been a very confusing, tumultuous, and painful ride. I have continued on with hope though, wanting to be a calm place in the storm for him, the only one at the moment who knows his Dx, and pray that he will have the strength to heal.
I don't envy you the position you're in.
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I've questioned more than once if it's worth it for my partner to struggle with all the uncertainty and confusion, just to be in this relationship with me. Perhaps seeing what's really going on is what helps her stick with it, like you say it helps you. I'm sure there are times when she, and perhaps you too, wonder what it'd be like not to have Dissociative Identity Disorder in our relationship. But she's accepted the fact that DID might always be a part of her life.
I'm grateful there are people like my partner, like you, who are willing to see past the disruptive nature of this disorder to the real human beings living with it. Not everyone is willing to take the time to educate themselves about their partner's mental illness. As someone with Dissociative Identity Disorder, I thank you for taking the time to learn what you can. Thank you for all this info. Have been or am, not really sure in a relationship with a person with DID. For me the most important thing has always been to accept who ever he is and to never be judgemental.
He however has cut-off all contact, mainly to as he says protect me and to not have to let me go through this. He does not want to give me any "trouble". But I am here for him, always. Not really sure what to do.
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I do not want to throw our friendship away but I do respect his wishes He is totally locking me out. I don't think i'm the one that can help him. It's just because I would like him to stay my friend. Wow I'm sorry about your relationship.
Passion and Fear in BPD Relationships
It must be very difficult to do everything you can to accept and care for someone only to be turned away, whether it's to protect you or not. I do understand the desire to protect others, though. I have often felt, in my darker moments, that other people would be better off without me. For me, I have to choose to have faith in my value as a human being during those times, until I can once again believe it. Whatever does or doesn't happen with your friend, you are helping to reduce the stigma just by educating yourself.
You're most likely taking the actions of one alter, or group of alters, expression as "the whole show" My bf has cut me off too, completely, for extended periods of time. But if you see what's really going on - that this is just what a PART of the system is expressing for this period of time, you'll also see, in time, if you stick around, that the other parts come back, and don't hold the same beliefs as the parts that pushed you away. DID I've learned is also an attachment disorder. Most multiples have parts that push others away -- you just have to see through the veil.
Almost two years after the last comment, this post is still helping people. I have recently started seeing a man with DID I didn't want to. He is such a special man, and I deeply want to be in his life, so I am trying to educate myself as much as possible. This thread of comments has helped me immensely.
I cannot detect his alters yet, but I recognize the similar pattern from the comments, of having him go from adoring me to breaking it off so he doesn't hurt me anymore, to coming back again and telling me how much he wants me in his life. I understand a little better what is going on now. I cannot thank you enough for this blog, and I look forward to reading more to help me to be the best support that I can to my sweet guy.
I have recently gone through the process of having many of my parts surface. It's been a difficult ride, and luckily I seem to have a fairly well-organised system although it seems to have more and more layers the more things unravel. I'm largely co-conscious, but for me the big problem is the acceptance lack of that I have for myself.
I've realised that in my 3 relationships I have had, I chose them specifically because each of the partners were emotionally unavailable and wouldn't 'see' me. I was in that relationship alone, and alone I felt safer. Accepting love is perhaps the most difficult concept to genuinely grasp when you're a fragmented system of abused parts.
As I've started to learn more about myself and my parts, I'm very gradually learning what it is to experience true intimacy. I was terrified to realise that I have been developing an intimate friendship recently, which has started to evolve into something romantic although not physical yet. Knowing that it's genuine, and that I haven't really got somewhere to hide is a big challenge for me.
This is someone who has known me for close to a year, seen my ups and downs, and still I think something slow developing is good, although I am worried that if it becomes a romantic relationship the dynamic will immediately change, and how other parts respond to that might become difficult. But the slower it progresses, the better my system can work out the best way to align, and we can reach an agreement. I was wondering if people are still writing on this page. I just found this website a couple days ago and am really glad to know I'm not alone.
I'm new at all this and I just want to see if people still comment. Thanks so much for this blog - reading through comments here has been so informative. I think that my daughter has DID.